The Places I've Cried in Public (A BBC Radio 2 Book Club pick): 1

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lastly, i just need to mention the writing. if i'll ever write a book i want to be able to write like that, so effortlessly, seamlessly, intimately and beautifully. The Nottinghill Carnival takes central stage in this story about families, memories and the power of dance and festivals. Author Yaba Badoe tells... I burned with fury while reading this book, and I hurt for Amelie so much. There was one horrible part of the book (CW: sexual assault) that I do find myself wishing wasn't added, just because I really appreciated the way this book focused on a more covert kind of abuse that I've seen too often and is harder to pinpoint. I cannot tell you how many friends I've comforted because the guy they were seeing was playing mind games, making plans then cancelling last minute, blowing hot and cold, or making snide comments about their appearance, clothes, or interests.

Amelie’s journey, ‘the dots on the map where you made me cry’, is self-destructive at points as she believes that she is ‘sure it’s all my fault somehow’ and if ‘only I’d done things differently’ and ‘been…less me, then I wouldn’t have driven you away’. This confusion and misconstrued belief that Amelie is somehow at fault for the destructive relationship, is so powerful, sad and infuriating that as a reader, you want to reach into the book and help her to see that it is not her, but Reese and no one should ever be ‘…less me’. Amelie's journey to understanding what happened in her relationship with Reese is not an easy one, but it's a journey of discovery and acceptance of herself that she desperately needed after what she went through. I was glad she had people who helped her along the way.

Over the last few years, I've become a big fan of Holly Bourne. Her contemporary novels combine some humour and charm with more serious issues, like abuse, sexual assault, and mental illness. I'm not sure which I'd consider her "best" work, but The Places I've Cried in Public was certainly one that shattered me. Amelia feels a special connection with Reese from the very first day that she meets him. She thinks he really gets her (which in a way he does) but what she doesn't see right then is that she is being controlled. On that note, I did have a rather love-hate relationship with the author’s writing style. I loved the touches of British slang and humour that I miss in a lot of the American YA that I read, but one of my pet peeves is when dialogue or angry thoughts are written in all capitals. It’s such a minor thing, but wow it grinds my gears and loses so much of the impact for me. I also find lyrics for fictional songs in books so jarring. I don’t know why but it makes me uncomfortable. Lyric writing and novel writing are two very different things so I find it awkward when a character gets told that she’s an amazing lyricist, but then we read the lyrics and they’re actually not that great. It’s just awkward to me. But these are such minor things in context of the novel. I think this book is a very important contemporary novel, but I cannot say I enjoyed reading it. I think I need to say straight off the bat, that the synopsis of this book is quite vague and it makes it sound essentially just like a break up story; but I must say that in my opinion this novel is a very tragic story of a rape and abuse victim coping with PTSD.

When her dad is made redundant, their family is uprooted from Sheffield to the South of England, meaning Amelie leaves her friends, and boyfriend behind. She and Alfie have an agreement, they’ll meet again at university but in the meantime, they are free to live their lives apart. But this story isn’t about Alfie, the boy who is there as an example of a healthy relationship. Overall, it wasn’t the most expertly written book I’ve ever read, but I think it explores some very important topics and is a book I wish I had read when I was a teenager. I’m interested to read more of Holly Bourne’s work so if anyone has any recommendations for me, please let me know in the comments! La escritura de Holly continúa siendo genuina y poderosa; aún en los momentos más difíciles logra transmitir la fuerza vulnerable pero resiliente de la juventud, sin caer en melodrama. Esto hizo que todo se sintiera aún más auténtico... y yo sufrí las puñaladas. Lloré como hace mucho no lloraba con un libro: de tristeza pero también de alivio... que refrescante es ver una afección mental tratada con el respeto que merece. Something I also really appreciated in this story, was how therapy is shown in a positive light. How Amelie figures out, by herself and, as she starts therapy, with conversations with her therapist, the issues in her previous relationship and slowly goes down that recovery road. Girls cry on park benches. Girls cry in train station waiting-rooms. They cry on the dance floor of clubs.Nothing that incriminating, of course. Nothing that couldn't be shushed away with a "you're too sensitive/needy/clingy/crazy". But damaging, nonetheless. Trigger warnings in this book for discussion and depictions of emotional and sexual abuse by a boyfriend.