The Empowered Wife: Six Surprising Secrets for Attracting Your Husband's Time, Attention, and Affection

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I was the perfect wife--until I actually got married. When I tried to tell my husband how to be more romantic, more ambitious, and tidier, he avoided me. I dragged him to marriage counseling and nearly divorced him. I then started talking to women who had what I wanted in their marriages and that’s when I got my miracle. The man who wooed me returned. This is the difference: Doing something pleasurable means it feels good in the moment you’re doing it, not afterward. Some activities may be both. For me, volleyball on the beach is both super fun while I’m doing it a nd makes me feel healthy and strong after I’ve stopped sweating and breathing heavily. I happen to get health advantages from that particular pleasure, but many things on my list have no such fringe benefits and are only beneficial because they ma k e me happy in the moment. Talking to my sisters on the phone, for instance, or singing in harmony, getting a facial, listening to my favorite radio show, lazing on the couch and watching a movie, or having coffee with a girlfriend. None of those things improve my aerobic capacity, help prevent diabe- tes, reduce greenhouse emissions, or declutter my house. They simply give me pleasure, which puts me in a good mood. That’s reason enough for me to make sure that I spend time doing those things—three of them, at least—every day. Hi Laura i am a young girl of 24 age and married for 2and half year i love my husband alot i took his care like a prince i dont want any obstacles to reach him weather a money problems or any other i help him out. from the date of wedding to till date i most say i have never ask any things from him in another wort if i have to say normally husband or boyfrind do everything for his girlfriend/ wife gives alot of love, care for her,help her in many ways but in my case i have to do all that financelly or emotationally i need to take care of him som times i feel like he has no feelings he dont show his feelings he dont understand anu kind of feelings bye the way he is kind of hard working man bud he have alot of things to learn in a relationship. Love this my husband after 30 years started drinking I started working again and it caused even more stress I forgot how positve silly happy and fun I am.

Now if he is having a bad time at work, for whatever reason, and he is the primary breadwinner, but he is a proud man. Of course she wants him to confide in her about what is going on, sure. Until he does and she starts to get anxious about the bills, or thinks he is not handling it right, or gets freaked out that they will not be able to pay the house and car notes. You’ll learn all of the coaching tools and concepts listed above by watching fun videos Laura created for you inside the online course portal, and then you’ll join us for weekly Zoom classes.If you aren’t happy yet, maybe you just haven’t done enough “frivolous” stuff for your own self-care–the more frivolous, the better, in my experience. I read Surrendered Wife several years ago, while my H was concurrently reading No More Mr Nice Guy. My hope was that we could change our dynamic a bit, from me being the one who wears the pants in the family to letting him wear them lol. I was really hoping the books would teach me to mellow out while teaching him to be more aggressive.

What????!!! You know what I went though at work this week... Then I had to take one of the kids to the doctor... Then I had to get ready for the fundraiser.... And then you know Sally wanted her BDay party. Hell I have been doing everything for everyone and I am exhausted... What is this about, I bet you want to have sex....DONT YOU..." Desperate to move our marriage forward my wife searched for years to an approach outside of counseling because she believed in your points that marriage counselors typically haven’t had our experiences. I think in a marriage where both want a different dynamic, the Surrendered idea can work. I do not think it will work with a man determined to be passive - you'll just end up frustrated while nothing gets done or decided. Today, only 3 days after starting he took out the garbage, did another job for me, washed the car, made a dentist appointment, plans on taking the car in for the oil change, offered to hold some stuff for me when I was struggling and He also took me out for a fancy lunch! Wow!!! I didn’t realize how well this would work! And he seems happy and more confident.How great that even after everything has changed, you’re ready for more. I admire your commitment and your new desire for a happy MARRIAGE! She is the founder of Laura Doyle Connect, a multi-national company that provides relationship coaching and programs for single women, girlfriends, and wives all over the world. She has appeared on CBS Evening News, Dateline NBC, The Today Show and The View. Articles about Laura have appeared in The Wall Street Journal, The New York Times, The Los Angeles Times, The Washington Post, The London Telegraph and The New Yorker. She is a regular contributor to The Huffington Post. It might be hugging a tree or reading a blog. It could be listening to funny podcasts, or snuggling with your pet, or riding your bike.